Get over it.
For God's sake, just smile!
Cheer up, love, it might never happen.
Heard those words before? Or, God forbid, have you been one of the people who have casually tossed out such careless remarks to someone in the grip of such consuming and black depression that even dragging themselves out of bed in the morning to get up and face a person like you seems almost an insurmountable task?
I've been there. The thought of ever returning to that place again terrifies me, for I know how much disdain is attached to the stigma of mental health problems in our society; the society that today lost a great man in Gary Speed. As a lifelong Newcastle United fan, his smiling example has long been one I've looked up to - he took the time to write a personal response and autograph to an excitable teenage fan when she wrote to him, and I've never forgotten that small kindness.
By all reports, he was a good man in every sense of the word, and to the outside world he seemed blessed with talent, a wonderful family and the perfect wife. Gary, though, was haunted by the darkness that can overwhelm even the strongest of people and it seems that it became too much.
Rest in the peace that you never found in life, Gary - and if any good can come of this tragedy, it'll be that maybe one person might bite back those cutting words before speaking them, or that someone who is suffering will be able to speak up and seek help without the fear of being dismissed.
RIP Gary.
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